思考 Thoughts


The cell phone rang at late night. There was no clock in my room so the only thing I knew for sure was it was really late.




“…Hello?” I answered my phone with my eyes closed, buried my face in my pillows and uttered words slowly with the rhythm of my own breathing.


“Sorry were you asleep?” My girlfriend asked with the voice contained mixture of apology and so-what attitude.


“Yeah, well…What’s going on?” I answered almost unconsciously.


“Wondered what you were thinking. Finished reading a book and I was about to go to bed, but I started wondering what other people were thinking all the time, and then I couldn’t sleep. And I couldn’t help calling you.”


“…I’m honored that you chose me. …But this is kind of a sudden. I thought of you before I went to sleep.”


“Did you think of something else other than me?”


“She didn’t feel flattered at all, not even amount of a tear of a sparrow, and swiftly asked the next question. I came to notice that apparently she was demanding me to engage my brain to the conversation regardless to this late night time.


“…I can’t remember. I emptied my head by doing yoga while listening to the sound of water as you told me to.”


I actually was drinking beer, but I said so because I thought there wasn’t that much of difference there.


“I think what we think and feel when we are drunk and falling asleep is pretty important. That’s why I called you this late. Thoughts are the axis people act based on, right? That’s why I think thoughts are very important even though they’re invisible, and I think thoughts slowly shape the reality.”


She liked making up various theories and telling me about those.


“…So, there is a high possibility that I will have a bagel for tomorrow’s breakfast, if I have a thought about a bagel right now?”


“Yeah. That’s the point. That’s my boyfriend, you are quick to grasp it.”


She said delightedly.


“And I wondered what the world was going to be like if something like collective consciousness worked, and every one started thinking that capitalism was kind of like a religion. I thought that kind of situation could possibly happen because now we could see so much of the actual savvy reality through the broken wall made up by media.”


She started talking about the main subject.


“Capitalism is a formidable opponent though.”


I said my honest impression.


“…By the way, I’m at the door. Could you come out?”


That’s my girlfriend. I felt delighted.


I crawled out from my soft blanket, opened the door, invited her, sincerely hugged her, and we went back inside the blanket which was warmed up by my body temperature. My girlfriend happily looked into my eyes. I kissed her, and she giggled mischievously. I don’t give a shit about capitalism and bagels, I thought. I held her and slowly went back into the slumber.


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